Do you still have a love connection?
Take this quick assessment to review your level of compatibility, intimacy, and understanding in your relationship.
We spend time together.
- We spend time together a few times weekly.
- We spend time together a few times monthly.
- We spend time together once a month or less.
We enjoy our time spent together.
- We always enjoy our time spent together.
- We sometimes enjoy our time together.
- We experience conflict more often than enjoyment during our time spent together.
We share values and compatibilities (children and family, religion, jobs,
friends, budget and finances, home, chores, etc.).
- We are clear about and share values, and are like-minded in areas of our lives.
- We disagree about some values and think very differently about areas of our lives.
- We have different values and often argue and disagree about areas of our lives.
We manage our differences and resolve conflicts.
- We always verbalize our concerns and negotiate matters, when necessary.
- We sometimes verbalize our concerns, and sometimes negotiate.
- We often argue about our concerns and rarely resolve them.
We express our individual desires with one another.
- We always feel comfortable and safe discussing our individual desires with one another.
- We sometimes feel comfortable.
- We never feel comfortable.
We are committed to increasing our level of intimacy.
- We are always conscious or our need for intimacy in our lives.
- We sometimes focus on intimacy, and notice that it has decreased over time.
- Intimacy is no longer a focus in our lives.
Now add up the number of A, B, and C responses according to the measure below to help you reflect on your level of connection:
# of A responses:____ x5 = ___
# of B responses:____ x4 = ___
# of C responses:____ x3 = ___
Total: = ___
27 - 30: You are conscientious of being compatible, and demonstrate your need to be open and close.
22 - 26: You are conscientious and motivated to remain connected, but can also benefit from learning new ways to feel comfortable and connected in your relationship. Consider therapy to do so.
18 - 21: Learning how to develop new behaviors to assist you with reigniting your relationship should be your top priority at this point.
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